Disclaimer: My general devil-may-care attitude towards Warcraft's lore hasn't changed in the past decade. I recognize some big names and will occasionally think "Hey, that's the dude/chick/dragon who did something I probably should know from something", but I've never actually cared enough to let things like "facts", "names", and accuracy impede my narratives. That may turn some of you off. I'm ok with that. Just clench your jaws, Pop Tart, and go to bed smug knowing that you're a better person than I for knowing the name of Stalvan Mistmantle's love.
On the other side of the portal I was treated with a series of "Welcome to Draenor" quests that required very little skill. Given that I was already a dozen shots of tequila in to my afternoon with no idea how to play my class optimally anymore, this wasn't as much of a nuisance as it would be normally. Fortunately, arcane mages still have all of the subtlety and nuance as a facially-applied sledgehammer, so I quickly got back in the groove of casual desolation. As expected, the first few "trash" quest rewards were far nicer than the epics I had left from the previous expansion, so I wasted no time making yesterday's photo obsolete, but horror came when I opened my inventory for the first time.
My bags were laden with noodles, fish, and a dozen types of cooked food. The treasures of a forgotten era vied with various dusts, elixirs, and toys for precious pack space. I was loathe to begin flushing things, fearful of accidentally discarding something of great value when it occurred to me that the odds of a consumable from two expansions back being worth more the gold from any single quest turn in was pretty slim. I'd price check the more esoteric garbage when the opportunity presents itself again, but for now I'd have plenty of space just from tossing the "obvious".
The second surprise came when I checked the mailbox and found a couple pages worth of notices. Apparently I'm still getting Brews of the Month and the Bottle of Binary Brew gave me a smile. Aside from that were a few notes from quest-givers who had given me their change-of-address notifications and a few general announcements of replacement toys and currencies... then I got to a notice that my Justice Points had been converted at some point at a rate of 47 silver each and.... woah.
Thank you, Easter bunny!
I'm still dreading looking in my bank or going through my alts. I'm going to need to steel myself for that.
In the meantime, after finishing the "Draenor 101" line, I'm left at my brand spanking new garrison which, as I understand it, most players develop a love/hate relationship with. For the unfamiliar, this is a little parcel of land that is "kinda like housing" in that players develop it by wasting time and money. What I haven't quite figured out is why I'd want to. Yes, there are a few little perks (like "horses go faster in Draenor") you get with certain upgrades, but I'm not out to impress anyone so overall I don't see this being a thing on which I'm going to spend too much effort. I'm very well aware I may live to eat those words, but at least I won't have to with a side dish of three year old noodles.
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